Tag Archives: sam i am

Planes, Trains and Tricks

The homie Sam is a hoe’s hoe. She’s one of dem hoes you high five every now and then because you’re both amazed and shocked at her hoeing capabilities and conquests.

I sometimes feel as if Ludacris wrote his song Area Codes just for Sam cuz I’m almost positive she’s turned tricks in almost every city she’s traveled to in the last few years. Now don’t get it twisted, I ain’t hatin’ on da homie. How could I? Her debaucherous adventures are not only entertaining but too good to even believe.

For example, last week, this bitch decided she was going to hook and fuck herself a youngen. They’re always of  legal age folks she ain’t no pedophile

I’m so sore.

You took Gallo for a spin again huh?

Shut up hoe! Gallo was two weeks ago. I saw one of my Cubs over the weekend.

So which one was it this weekend… T.I. The hair puller. Durty 30. Vanilla Swirl. 

NOBODY ASKED YOU PATRICE! Fuck you dawg and your damn names for my conquests. 

Hahahahahaha ma bad dawg I’m just trying to keep up!

Bitch ass hoe I can’t stand you! 

Lmmfao what I say dawg? So was it a regular or someone new?

It was Durty Durty 30. Mmmm what a fahn YUNG and HUNG specimen he was. Lawd have murky the thangs he could do wit his….

Eh yo dawg! Come back to reality Rowdy Rosie! 

GTFOH dawg. I was just reminisckin about his luscious and rock solid…

Here we go! Lemme know when you outta ya trance.

Love this bitch to death but she’s so fucking graphic with her descriptions that she forgets she’s at work or in front of folks when she’s talkin me. I have to insult her in order to get her mind right. It’s like listening to a porno or some shit.

I’m done dawg my dawg. You know I love being a nasty whore. 

Yeah negro I know! I know!

So anyway, we went for dranks and appetizers at a joint like the one I took you to in Irving. Then we found a secluded garage and I rode his ass from here to next Thursday. 

Again in a fucking garage dawg? You and your public displays of ratchet whoreridness. Cheeky bitch that’s why ya old ass is sore. 

Thanks maw! 

What happened to cheap motels and HOtels? What happened to going back to his or yo place? LMFAO you’ve always been an exhibitionist. 

Duty called dawg. Plus it wasn’t that kind of party. He’s the one minute man. Get in. Get off. Get out! 

Fucking bitch I can’t stand you. Hahahahahahaha

Too ratchet? 

Naw negro just up yo alley literally!

I swear Sam’s a pimp. She has to be mayne… I don’t know anyone… NT1 sound it out folks that will randomly state I feel like being a whore in the middle of a conversation. Who da fuck does that but Sam?

My friends are best ain’t they?!