Category Archives: What The Fuck?!

Something to Ponder: I’m Not Like Other Girls

My big sis sent this to me the other day and it got me thinking. ha like i need ANYTHING to make me think

Take a gander.

treatment of women

I have to say in my opinion I’m not at all like most girls.

Cliché or not, I pride myself on being different. On not conforming to what religious conservatives deem how my race and gender should behave and look like. For not focusing my life on the media’s portrayal of what a black woman should be.

I’m very much a tomboy who thoroughly enjoys cursing and swearing, watching AND playing sports as well as throwing back a cold brew or a stiff put hair on your chest drank. I talk mad shit wit the boys and make lewd and inappropriate jokes. I’m a car enthusiast and aspiring mechanic. Did I mentioned I fucking HATE dressing like a damn girl? absolutely loathe that shit! You have NO idea!

I have wildly crazy natural hair that seems to have a mind of her own but I don’t nor will I straighten it because someone else tells me to or because society says I’m not pretty. Luquisha is hur to stay bitches!

I have a big ass but I don’t really try to accentuate it to make it seem like my milkshake brings all the boys (or girls) to the yard or even come swarming towards me.

My attitude at times is not because I’m uneducated or don’t got common fucking sense cuz I got a fucking degree from a top notch school mayne but because I like to be funny and adapt to my surroundings and people around me.

Lately, there seems to be a great amount of talk about women and how we should behave, think, feel and exist.

Women are expected dress a certain way otherwise we must be a two dollar hoe just cuz we show some damn skin or boobs or leg.

Women are expected to be more inclined to stay at home, clean house, take care of the churrin stupid grown ass child included, have a hot meal on the table at least twice a day and put out whenever and however the husband pleases.

We can’t be independent and do for ourselves because we’re the weaker sex. We can be sexualized against our will but not sexual on our own accord.

We can’t be President or a coach in the pros.

We cannot possibly be capable of running a successful revenue generating company.

Nope women can’t possibly ever be as omnipresent, professional, deserving of the good life or intelligent as the men who are consistently trying to gain the upper hand by backhandeding their peers. Don’t get it twisted women are just as conniving and ruthless. But unfortunately, women, especially women of color, are under paid significantly compared to a male counterpart in the same position, skill sets and tenure.

Soooooo whachu gettin at Southern Yankee?

This: Women deserve to be treated better. Women deserve to be revered as worthy of anything we put our damn minds too. Young girls like my daughter and nieces should be able to name more than a handful of women who have done something significant in the world’s history.

Women should be afforded the same opportunities as men in everything. Not because we can do everything better because we absolutely can but because the next generation needs to see that. How are we to tell our daughters, nieces, sisters, granddaughters and cousins you can be anything your heart desires if we, the current adults, don’t first set the example? No I’m not saying our sons, brothers, grandsons, etc can’t be whatever they want but in all honesty, boys obviously have it easier unless they’re gay; which then it’s a whole other ball game and certainly a whole other blog post.

Why is it women are good enough to be wives and mothers but not everything else under the sun?

Why are we selfish for wanting a career over family?

Why must we be belittled for having an opinion or fuck even an idea?

Why can’t we be equal citizens under the law instead of being subject to a religiously conservative white male’s opinion of who we are and should be?


Thanks for reading…
the southern yankee 

Hateful Ass Fuckers

At what point in our existence will we respect each other as people and stay the fuck out of another person’s personal life? At what point will “it ain’t nonya fuckin business what or who I do” finally register to conservative religious holier than who apparently are just as sinful but never talk about it assholes.

I read a Huffington Post article about a bill proposed of course by a conservative white Republican that would allow a business and/or business owner to invoke their religious beliefs to fire an unmarried woman if she became pregnant. Does that make sense to you guys? It certainly doesn’t to me. But what do I know? I’m just a stupid girl according to some people in this world.

Pardon my French but I just don’t understand why the fuck religious conservatives feel the need to not only impose their religious beliefs on others but propose laws inspired by a book that was written thousands of years ago. I don’t understand why people like the politicians in the article or even Kim Davis, Rowan County, Kentucky County Clerk, feel their religious freedoms are being infringed upon due to the actions of others.

Someone please explain to me how the lives of others infringe upon one’s religious, political or civil liberties. Explain to me how a politician would propose such a law that would directly impact not one but two lives if a single pregnant woman is fired from her job because she isn’t married.

So does that mean the following possible scenarios subject women to dismissal from their jobs if this piece of fuckery gains enough strength to pass:

  • Single women who do not wish to be married but want children
  • Single women who are raped, become pregnant due to said heinous act and decide to keep the child
  • Women who were in relationships but the partner leaves upon finding out the woman is pregnant you know there are some triflin fuckers out there who will and have done this
  • Women in relationships but not married
Does that also mean that lesbians suffer a twofold discriminative dismissal from their jobs because their pregnant and gay? I think that’s a valid question to ask. Religious conservatives already have a conniption about same-sex relationships. Imagine the “rioting” of the religious right if a pregnant lesbian showed up at work. Shocking!
Sigh, I just want to understand. I want to understand how a country founded upon the notion of every person has a right to “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” somehow finds ways to alienate its citizens in every which way possible. I want to understand how we as a country became so concerned with what goes on behind closed personal doors instead of being concerned with the lack of affordable healthcare, equal educational opportunities for all and gun control. How and why did affordable housing, veteran affairs and care, homeland security and other more pressing matters take a backseat to the private intimate lives of citizens?
I’m confused at how the separation between church and state has somewhat become non-existent over the last few years. I’m confused as to why someone else’s religious beliefs should directly impact my rights as a citizen of the United States of America. I grew up in a black Southern Baptist family. I know more about the Bible than most people would think I would. I believe in and pray to what I believe is a loving, generous and understanding God. Yet I’m a strong believer in finding out who God is or isn’t in your own way. i don’t believe that my religiously conservative family has a right to tell me how, when, where and why to believe in Jesus and the Holy Father without allowing me to get to know the Holy Trinity for myself.
So many people are turning away from religion because of laws that allow citizens and/or businesses to discriminate against others because of their religious beliefs. When did God become a discriminatory individual? When did freedom become limited only to the haves and not the have nots? How can we expect our children to grow up tolerant when their are so many intolerant people in the world? By the way, intolerance, racism and discrimination are learned notions and beliefs. Children aren’t born that way. Take that for which you will. It’s just a thought.
Thanks for reading….
the southern yankee 

Less Than Human

In the wake of the mass shooting at Emanual AME Church, I wonder when will this bullshit stop.

I wonder when this world will wake up and realize we have no right to treat another human being with any less respect than we would want for ourselves. I fear everyday prolly more now than when I was younger if someone is going to try to hurt me simply because I’m black or a woman. I live, breathe and sleep in fear. Life isn’t supposed to be this way. It isn’t supposed to be filled with thoughts of “is today the day.” 

The fact that black folks and possibly other minorities are dying far faster than the white person possibly reading this post or driving down road is completely unsettling to me.

The fact that black people are still revered as “less than human” in a country who has a half black president saddens me to no end. Why are we called the land of opportunity when the only people who seem to receive all the opportunities are white, conservative, evangelical with a dick between their legs? 

What makes us so much easier to abuse, kill off, subject to ill humane treatment and looked down upon than everyone else? 

Why must black mamas worry every fucking day their son(s) leave the house?

Why do cops troll us on the street for no reason other than we black? Just cuz I’m driving while black through a small ass hillbilly Podunk area doing absolutely nothing wrong does not give you the right to pull me over because “my tail light is out” when it clearly worked before ya racist ass stopped me.

Why are white supremacist groups such as the Ku Klux Klan, the Aryan Brotherhood, Neo-Nazis still in existence? Why have we not grown past the hateful unjust idiocies of these groups? Why are folks protesting the removal of symbols such as the Confederate Flag when they clearly represent the Antebellum South, racism and slavery? How is that not understandable? 

Are you tired of my questions yet cuz I’m not?

What happened to being created equal in the eyes of The Lord? 

The bible teaches us to love thy neighbor as we would love ourselves. Jesus preached a message of love, understanding and tolerance yet people use that subjectively. God so loved the world that He gave his only son so that who ever believed in him shall have everlasting life. Yet here we are talking about racism and inequality. 

Dumb fucks need to realize and understand that just because another person does not look like him or her or have the same ideals does not necessarily prove inferiority. It doesn’t make another human being any less deserving of the same quality of life as you and yours.


I’m tired. 

I’m tired of living in fear.

I’m tired of reading about someone’s baby being shot in cold blood. 

I’m tired of certain media organizations and we all know which one I’m talking about trying to down play the obvious and blatant racism the Emanual AME Church shooting as well as multiple other shootings of black folks that happened this year alone.

I’m tired of feeling helpless. 

I’m just so fucking tired. 

Thanks for reading…

the southern yankee 

Bees in the Tramp

There are several types of hoes.

There’s the hoe’s hoe. This is a hoe that fucks around for shear fact of fucking around. This gal or guy loves sex. Like luuuuuuuuvs sex. He or she is careful about who the fuck buddy is and how many to keep around at any given time. A hoe’s hoe understands that he or she may not be the other persons sole fuck buddy. He or she also understands the necessity of having protection on them at all times and the importance of getting tested every three to six months.

There’s a T H O T. Pronounced like thought. According to Urban Dictionary, T H O T stands for that hoe over there. T H O T is by no means one of those words that should be taken as a compliment. If you’re called a T H O T, yous a nasty hoe. You the hoe nobody wants to touch wit a ten foot pole. No amount of or even strength of contraceptive is enough to fuck wit a damn T H O T. NO TING AT ALL MAYNE!

Then there’s a thirsty hoe. A thirsty hoe tries too fucking hard to be everything and anything for the fuck buddy of the day, week or month. A thirsty hoe wants to be with someone so bad that he or she will fuck anybody who shows even the slightest ounce of attention. Thirsty hoes don’t always see the writing on the fucking wall. More often there are bright red gargantuan flags waving in they damn face but yet so so supposedly loves him or her. No bitch not even close. Yous a T H O T wit too much damn ambition.

The homie Sam and I know this thirsty T H O T who fancies herself as a hoe’s hoe but that bitch ain’t even close. We’re gonna call her Roper, for reasons you will soon understand. If I remember Roper correctly, she’s a shawt sorta stocky broad. Sweet as pie but dumb as fuck when it comes to fuckin’ around. Here lately Sam’s stories about her have been everything short of logical.

For example, let’s start with Tree Rompus. 

Dawg have I told you about Roper’s latest adventure?

Do I really wanna know? After the Fast Keys Eddie, I can’t bear to hear anything else about this hoe. 

I have to tell you dawg because it confuses me and I need to know I ain’t crazier than I already am. 

It’s that serious huh? Fine what and I use that term loosely she do nah?

Well she met this dude online. She say he got money and a nice house. 

Here we go. 

Dawg it gets better.


She met him after only talking to him for a couple of days. AND when she met him he wasn’t exactly the age posted on his profile. 

Please stop this. I’m already spent with her.

Wait man just lemme finish 

Jesus lawd why do I love a good chisme 

Anyway…. So she went over to his house the other day. He met her outside. And led her into the back yard. 

Oh hells naw you can stop this story nah dawg cuz I already know where it’s leading. Why is Roper do damn stupid?

Zxactly my thoughts when she told me about it the other day. But wait it gets better. He’s apparently a freak nasty old fucker cuz he asked her if he could tie her up. S&M type shit.

But they in the backyard dawg?! Where da fuck would he… (Dramatic Pause) Oh hell da fuck naw! No bitch why is she so stooooopid?!?! You need better hoe friends.

Precisely my damn point. I wanted to crawl over the table and smack her dumb thirsty T H O T ass. 

She asked no questions? Said hey this is a little too freaky deeky? Certainly some sorta red flags were waving right?! RIGHT?!?!




Dawg, please find better hoe squad members. This shit is too triflin’ for me right now. 

You see what I deal wit?!

You wouldn’t have to if you’d cut these hoes loose.

Soooo what you thank? 


Snap… Clank… POP! 

I left the house like I normally would on a Tuesday. Looking skrait up bobo ready to hit the gym hard. I packed up my truck, turned her on and off I went.

I was backing outta the drive way when I hard a loud disturbing grinding sound. I thought maybe it was mud or some shit stuck in the wheels and underneath. That usually falls off the more I drive. But um it didn’t go away. I got to the end of the street and it was still loud and screechy.

I decided to continue to my usual early morning destination. The sound was persistent and annoying but I trekked on. I exited I45 at Cullen and Elgin, turned to go underneath the overpass and heard snap, clank and pop.

No this wasn’t at all like the cereal I used to eat when I was a child. The little elves didn’t come out to greet me. Nope. All I got was my own voice screaming cuz I was scared shitless.

I pulled into the parking lot so my friend could check out my truck.

I turned the wheel to the right. Nada.

I turned the wheel to the left. Nada.

Pulled forward.

Backed that thang up.

Made a loopty loo.

Not a got damn thing.

By this time, I was pissed, worried and without coffee. Fuck! It was too dark to see what was wrong.

So I left. I text my boss around 06:00 to say I needed to take a personal day to take care of my Prime. Part of me wanted to risk driving to work but the better part of me said “nope take yo ass to the dealership!!” So I did. Unfortunately, I was too damn scared to stop anywhere for crack to calm my got damn nerves.

She skreeched, squealed and cursed me the fuck out. I drive so damn slow I pissed myself off. Cars were zooming by left and right. Angry drivers tryingn to hurry up to beat traffic to work, school and/or home from the overnight shift. I didn’t push much. Just to 60mph.

Every part of me wanted to cry. No I wasn’t having a girl moment. I was just pissed about the idea of dropping more money for my truck when I ain’t even got nothing to drop. Fucking hate being a fucking adult.

I got to the dealership and waited for them to open for the day. I talked to one service advisor who lawd bless him was more asleep than I was. He had me wait for a little bit until another service advisor came. She showed up and asked questions that the male service advisors have never asked before. I came down from a 50 to a 35 after talking to her.

I left my keys and my Prime at the dealership. My “other” parents came to get me. Now I wait. Y’all know I hate waiting. It’s now a little after 13:00CT.

No calls.


No texts.


Or even a damn email.


Sigh. I hate waiting.


Thanks for reading…


The Southern Yankee