Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life

Life is funny.

When you’re little, your viewpoint of the world is seen through young and impressionable eyes. Everything you see you want. Everything thrown at you is some sort of adventure and an excuse to get out of the house.

When you’re a teenager, the world seems against you. There’s the introduction of boys and girls, school dances, the possibility of the first kiss or sexual encounter and puberty. Lawd puberty for some people was completely life altering.

When you graduate from high school, the world is one’s oyster. One can choose to go to college, the military or just enter the workforce. Hell some of my high school friends got married and started having babies. not I said the fly

Between the ages of 18 and 29, life becomes even funnier. The world as you know it underneath your parents’ roof changes faster than you can even change your dirty draws. Life becomes about going to college or enlisting in the military or just entering the work force. Life can take you in so many directions and all you have to do is choose the path that suits you the best.

Well I thought going straight to Baylor was the best choice for me. Hell emotionally it WAS the best choice because I could not fathom staying another year or two at home living next door to my grandmother. But what if I had stayed home? What if I had gone to the local community college and gotten a job either on campus or with my sister at HEB? Perhaps everything that happened to me at Baylor would not have happened. Perhaps my grades would have been higher.

Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps

So many coulda woulda shoulda moments from my college days at Baylor. I don’t regret going to Baylor because I’m just as much a proud Baylor Bear as any other alum. But at the same time, I wish I could have been a better student. Perhaps I would be working on my masters or doctorate right now instead of a second bachelors degree. Perhaps I would be where so many of my friends from Baylor are now. I have to wonder how life would be different had I just stayed my ass at home those two years after high school. If I would be a successful journalist or press person instead of at a job I dislike more than the smell of chitlins. trust me the smell of chitlins is that bad

Yes it clearly bothers me that I didn’t do half of what I could have during my late teens and twenties. Yes I can have time to fulfill my dreams but at the same time, I have to believe that God has something else for me to do with my life. That I am still meant to do and accomplish the impossible. I just have to keep the faith and my eyes on the prize.

Thanks for reading…

The Southern Yankee

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